Oh so quiet

I'm on my own today, and it's spookily quiet.
Good quiet.

Having three kids around is a noisy business.

It's hard to admit, but I found it difficult being with he who left me when the kids were there. Things were always gentler, easier, when they were out or away.

We didn't have enough time on our own in the beginning, when things were really good, to really get things sorted and get a good base for when things got rockier, I think.
When people first meet, it's often before they have kids, or away from the kids, but we were always all together.

I found it difficult so I know he must have done -- and he said as much.

When he first left part of me thought that it was only temporary.
My kids are getting older -- one has already left school.
I thought when it was quieter, he would come back.

But I was kidding myself.

It was me he left, not them.