Mea Culpa

Well, I finally did it.

I sent him a text: I miss you. xx

We exchanged a few texts -- pleasantries, more or less.
He says he can't talk (text) right now because he's hyper, in a bad sort of way.
I never did really understand what that meant.

Do I feel better for it, or worse?
Hard to say at the moment.
I certainly feel something -- I cried a lot this afternoon.
He's ill -- he says they are doing tests. I want him to be well.
I feel like I want to hold him, and stroke his ears (he liked that) and tell him everything will be ok. But somewhere at the back of my head a little voice is asking who is going to hold me? Who is going to stroke my ears?
And how much more am I going to get hurt?