night swimming

Hey,

Today was hard work.

It was very hot, so I opened the patio doors, only to find out that one of them is busted and wouldn't shut. It took me and daughter number one forever to close it and when we'd managed that we found out it wouldn't lock.
I had visions of us sleeping in shifts so that someone could stand guard in the dining room all night.
But luckily we don't give up easily, and after much ado we got it locked. Not properly, but enough to stop someone wandering in.
That was scary.

And all the plaster is falling off the walls and all the fucking lights keep blowing and I'm just too fucking tired to deal with it.

Maybe it's pms, I don't know. But I feel crappy.
I feel so scared when something housey goes wrong and it's just me and the kids. Its a big responsibility.

And that BT advert is winding me up. Woman with two children meets man and everything works out hunky-dory.
Not in my life, it doesn't.