It's been 11 days now since I lost my baby boy. It's so hard to be without him. There is a constant soundtrack in my head, just repeating "I want him back. I want him back. I want him back..."
But then I think about Buffy (for some bizarre reason!), and when her mom came back, but she came back wrong, and I don't want that for my baby.
I just hope it starts getting easier soon, because this is killing me.
In other news, my son has returned to uni, to a privately rented house where he is living with 3 friends. I don't care what people say about students; I think that the conditions they have to live in are appalling, and I think they do so well coping with that on top of studying and being away from home. My son is lucky - he has a really nice landlord and the house isn't too bad. At least - it's better than number one daughter's second year house. I wouldn't even step inside the door at that place.
Luckily, my son only has to cope with a bug infestation and dodgy plumbing...
And in other other news, number 2 daughter is "back" with her boyfriend. I say "back", but "back" consists of him screaming at her in the street and her slamming the door in her face. I have no idea why she chooses to live like this? She should be happy, in love, and being treated like a princess, not going through this shit every day.
But telling her that is the best way to make her stay with him.
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Some days I feel like Betty Blue. Other days it's more like Betty Boop.
